As I suddenly find myself repatriated to the Cleveland area, it has been an interesting experience seeing the place again. And considering that I find myself working in a town that borders the very town where I grew up, it seems that I have not gotten very far in my attempts to avoid the place like a leper colony. However, it does seem that fate had that in store for me, so what can a guy do?
Because I have deliberately made myself an outsider to Cleveland, I have been able to observe a few interesting things about this town and its denizens and I thought I would write about my observations to all that person out there who will, for some reason, read this.
Okay, so your local baseball team is right in the middle of a race for the playoffs. What do you do? If you said, “Go to the games,” you’d be wrong! Heck no, they’re not going to the games! And is it any wonder why? If you had the record Cleveland does in major sports, you’d avoid the ballpark too.
When the Mudville Nine keeps losing every big game, eventually the folks there are going to stop having faith in Casey. And considering the record of the Indians, Browns and Cavaliers (no titles in a major sport since the ‘60’s) I think it’s safe to say that the locals are fed up.
Yes, Cleveland is tired of the “banana in the tailpipe” and they are showing it. Everyone I talk to is just waiting for the Indians to blow it, like every other team in this city has for about 40 years. As a recovering Browns fan and a Buckeye fan, I can understand this completely. You can save yourself a lot of trouble by quitting now.
Which, of course, means that the Indians are probably going to win the World Series, just so Clevelanders can be disappointed again – this time because they didn’t go to the ballpark to see this team play earlier in the year. And, as a matter of fact, yes, the universe really is conspiring to make Clevelanders’ lives miserable.
I have frequently been asked, “So what do you think of the place?” since I arrived, and it is usually phrased rather uncertainly. As in, “Please say you like it.” Of course, I usually say that I can’t tell the difference between it and all of the other towns I’ve been to (which is partially true, the suburbs are all indistinguishable). However, you can tell that this is a town that had its heyday in the ’60s and ‘70s.
Most of the houses you see were built back then. Unfortunately, they were built too small even for that time and many of them have not been kept up terribly well. Some of them have this strange sort of pall to them that gives the idea that things are not altogether good in the structure. It as though they are giving a brave smile while lying in the hospital bed. Quite honestly, it’s like sunshine doesn’t hit them quite right. I don’t know how I get this impression from inanimate objects, but it is there and it is much like the impression I got from houses in the seedier sections of Los Angeles.
There do seem to be some signs of change on the horizon, what with the fact that the city is trying to bring people back to the downtown and they are putting in some housing complexes there. Who know if it will work, but at least somebody is doing SOMETHING, as per a previous post by me.
As per a previous post, I made a deal with Cleveland that I would stop rooting for the Yankees if they would stop rooting for Michigan. I have seen a lot of scarlet and gray around here lately, so it seems that I might have to back up my statement. This seems to coincide with the realization that the city of Columbus exists, so this has helped awareness. However, should I stop rooting for the Yankees, I reserve the right to enact my Yankees fandom again upon subsequent UM rooting on the part of this city.
Of course, as of right now, everyone is Cleveland is a Yankees fan too, so I seem to have been onto something.
I fucking hate snow.