Day 3- Amsterdam at night

The Red Light District. Allow me to explain the name. The district is named for the red neon lights above each window/door behind which sits some woman in lingerie selling the sort of services that even Las Vegas frowns upon. Yes, you can window shop for whatever dating substitute you may be looking for that evening. Don’t worry, they cover the window with a curtain when they are on the clock, so the private investigator will only have circumstantial evidence.

There isn’t really a whole lot to describe with our night in Amsterdam. Our evening there was pretty much just another tour. We went out and saw the sights: hookers, hash bars, more hookers, a bar, hookers and we checked out the hookers. It was remarkable the prostitutes make any money (some I wonder about more than others) considering the phenomenal number of women in the windows. They are lined up along streets, alleys, indoor hallways and gaps between buildings. Supply is plentiful, but it seems like demand would eventually like to roll over and get some sleep.

We each had a beer in a hash bar (they call themselves coffeehouses, probably because it is more tasteful than "Hans’ Bong-a-rama"), once again more for the purpose of visiting one than any intent to use it. It was a pretty neat place. For anybody in the reading audience who has ever visited or attended The Ohio State University, it looked a heck of a lot like Bernie’s with the lights on. For those who are reading but are not initiated to The Ohio State University, Bernie’s is in Columbus, Ohio on High Street near 17th Ave. Feel free to visit anytime and imagine it with the lights on.

Otherwise, we toured the streets and saw the sights and drank the beer. We discovered just how wonderful those stinking, free, outdoor "toilets" can be when you really have to go. This structure would be more accurately described as a large metal spiral into which you walk when you need take care of business. You do so onto a piece of sheet metal that leads straight down into a drainage hole in the concrete. It is nothing beyond crudely functional, and it is marked by a sign that is VERY clear on exactly what that function is. It was not at all designed with women in mind, but then neither was the rest of the area.

Incidentally, we saw a movie filming in the canals of Amsterdam. It was intriguing from the standpoint of the cameras, lights, cables, grips, gaffers, seeing portions of it set up during the day and the fact we saw a little filming. I can’t recommend it however, as I don’t know what the name is. I do know that it is some Dutch guy, though, so visit your local theaters and video stores and ask if they have anything by "that Dutch guy" and you can look for us on the screen! It won’t do you much good, we were never filmed, but you can feel free to look for us in that or any other movie you watch.

On another side note, I seem to remember having a slice of pizza somewhere along the line and being very sure I got it without any mushrooms.

To sum it all up, Amsterdam was a pleasant evening out with a few beers at a few bars. A nice, relaxing time in a very enjoyable city.